Very nice. I like the mood of this; I think the present tense really contributes well to it.
I have to say that this line cracked me up because I once had a sort of opposite experience:
Harry excuses himself to go to the bathroom, and as he's coming back, he hears the waitress asking Lupin if his son would like any more soda.
My father had gone to the bathroom, and the waitress asked me if my... friend... would like some more coffee. And yes, the tone of voice implied that she thought we were a couple. I was just barely not jailbait at the time. I calmly replied that my father had asked me to ask for the check; she turned bright red. *grin*
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Date: 2004-07-01 10:34 am (UTC)I have to say that this line cracked me up because I once had a sort of opposite experience:
Harry excuses himself to go to the bathroom, and as he's coming back, he hears the waitress asking Lupin if his son would like any more soda.
My father had gone to the bathroom, and the waitress asked me if my... friend... would like some more coffee. And yes, the tone of voice implied that she thought we were a couple. I was just barely not jailbait at the time. I calmly replied that my father had asked me to ask for the check; she turned bright red. *grin*