Crackfic.

[pauraque_bk]

Title: The One Where They're All Reincarnated As Space Pirates
Rating: PG
Word count: 205
I blame: xylodemon. Squarely.

'Avast!' called reincarnated!Draco heartily. 'Secure the rigging! Hard a-starboard!'

'I don't think we're meant to be that kind of pirate,' reincarnated!Harry said as he realigned the warp core which they had recently pilfered from the hapless Cepheid freighter captained by reincarnated!Ginny.

'Oh,' said reincarnated!Draco, slipping his eyepatch discreetly into the pocket of his space suit. 'I knew that.' He peered over the railing on the very futuristic-looking catwalk. 'Then... what exactly... I mean...'

'The fact that we were reincarnated together expresses the deep spiritual bond that we could never accept in our former lives due to random happenstance beyond our control,' explained reincarnated!Harry with a frown.

'Like you being sorted into Gryffindor?'

'Like you being an utter prick.'

'Aha.'

'Piracy represents the taboo nature of our relationship,' continued reincarnated!Harry with a grunt, ratcheting the new glowing crystals into place in the interstellar engine, 'which society can never accept. And I can't even begin to go into the sexual symbolism of stealing reincarnated!Ginny's warp core.'

'Oh,' said reincarnated!Draco again, looking crestfallen. 'Are you sure it's not just an excuse for filthy manporn?' he asked hopefully. 'In space?'

'Very sure,' said reincarnated!Harry, pressing the spent crystals into reincarnated!Draco's hands. 'Now go toss these out the air lock.'

fin.


Oh, and happy Valentine's Day. :)

Comments

[xylodemon.livejournal.com]

Filthy manporn. In space.

*flails on the inside*

You win. You win everything.

[pauraque]

You made me. I couldn't not. :D

[florahart]

*flails on the inside*

*envisions inverted, in the sense of inside-out not upside-down, Kermit the Frog with his arms going all crazy inwardly.*

...this is really quite the image in my brain.

Also, Eo, ahahahahahahaha. Stolen warp core, huh? :D

[pauraque]

For a second I was going to make it meta-smut and post it for the challenge, but fortunately I realized that was not a good idea. :D

[xylodemon.livejournal.com]

*envisions inverted, in the sense of inside-out not upside-down, Kermit the Frog with his arms going all crazy inwardly.*

Exactly like that. Exactly. Also, I may have squealed.

[muridae-x.livejournal.com]

You know, I could almost see this coming. From the moment that crack!fic and space pirates got mentioned in your AU post...

Hee.

[pauraque]

Then you're more prescient than me! I did not know this was lurking inside my brain. ^_^

[muridae-x.livejournal.com]

Well, I didn't necessarily know that it was lurking inside your brain. But I suspected that it might be lurking deep inside the brain of someone reading your journal.

I have a Filch/Fat Lady fic inhabiting mine. I really ought to prod it a bit more and see if it'll come out to play properly.

[tekalynn.livejournal.com]

*snerk*

With all the brilliance of gold-plated latinum dilithium crystals. *bows low*

[pauraque]

Muahaha. Thx.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_hannelore/]

'The fact that we were reincarnated together expresses the deep spiritual bond that we could never accept in our former lives due to random happenstance beyond our control,'

This wins the day. Ahahahhaaha! XD

[pauraque]

I think this may have come partly from too much dinosaurcomics!

[son-of-darkness.livejournal.com]

Oh man... this has made my day. *dies just a little* XD

[pauraque]

*revives you just slightly*

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

We can all only wish to be reincarnated as filthy man-porn in space, I think. Poor Draco stuck in a fantasy with people who don't know how to take full advantage of the fantasy!

[pauraque]

Poor Draco stuck in a fantasy with people who don't know how to take full advantage of the fantasy!

That sort of describes canon!Draco too. :D