when I grow up

[pauraque_bk]

In discussing Sirius's immaturity, something occurred to me. We're most familiar with six people from the class of '79 (or so): Sirius, Pettigrew, Lupin, James, Lily, and Snape. Of the six, two were murdered, two turned Death Eater, and one was wrongfully imprisoned. This was all at about the same time, when they were all roughly twenty years old. James and Lily didn't get the chance to grow to full adulthood, in the most literal sense, but Sirius, Peter, and Snape didn't get that chance either -- they had their hands full just trying to survive. How much can you mature, living as an animal for thirteen years? Or as a prisoner? Or as a spy?

Looking at those three as men in their thirties, their behavior is difficult to understand. But if you consider that none of them has had the chance to mature past the age of twenty, their actions start to make a lot more sense. To an extent, they still have adolescent sensibilities.

So where does that leave Lupin? He's the odd man out. To the best of our knowledge, though he suffered through watching his friends' trauma, he escaped the catastrophic events of his early twenties relatively unscathed, and free to make his own choices. And again, this shows in his current behavior. He's one of the few adults of his generation who actually acts like an adult. He's had time to step back and get some perspective, a luxury the others didn't have.

(By the way, on a completely different note... I'm probably addressing the wrong audience, but has anyone else heard this CD of string quartet covers of Tool songs? Christ, it's good.)

Comments

[theatresm.livejournal.com]

*sings* Ooooooo, thank you! 'zacktly what I've been thinking -- although I hadn't thought about Remus in those terms.

(On the other hand, he's been undergoing his own kind of hell: struggling just to physically survive. If no one wants a werewolf in school, who wants to hire one?)

[pauraque]

On the other hand, he's been undergoing his own kind of hell: struggling just to physically survive. If no one wants a werewolf in school, who wants to hire one?

True, but he's been dealing with that reality... probably ever since he can remember. He wasn't expecting anything different -- sad, but true.

Still, Remus is a guy with a lot of weight on his shoulders. He feels guilty for what happened to his friends -- survivor's guilt, in a way. And that's painful too, but it's a different kind of pain.

[muridae-x.livejournal.com]

I think you've hit the nail on the head there when you talk about the immaturity of Snape and Sirius. That's something that's often struck me too. In their different ways they've been frozen in time at the age where everything went seriously wrong for them... as indeed was Peter. There's nothing very maturing about spending half a lifetime masquerading as a rat, after all.

Whereas Lupin's tragic reversals happened much earlier in his life, when he was bitten by the werewolf, and he was able to go through a happy period later on and reclaim some of his lost childhood at school. Sure, he's probably had a hard life; his problem makes him almost unemployable, and he lost pretty much all his close friends. But he was already used to hardship, and I think that's made him tougher and more resilient, more able to shrug his personal disasters off and get on with the task of living.

In fact, he was probably an adult before his time. Hogwarts gave him a second chance at childhood, before he had to go out into a harsher world and be mature again. I suspect that Sirius and James and even Lily probably thought all the cloak and dagger stuff against Voldemort was something of a game and a bit of a lark, even when it was dangerous, at first anyway; I doubt Lupin ever took it that lightly. I suspect that other than in the brief of flashes, when egged on into it by others, he was never quite that young.

[pauraque]

In their different ways they've been frozen in time at the age where everything went seriously wrong for them...

Yes, that's exactly what I'm trying to get at. If you suffer a trauma that is never dealt with, part of you is stuck at the age when it happened, unable to catch up.

Whereas Lupin's tragic reversals happened much earlier in his life, when he was bitten by the werewolf, and he was able to go through a happy period later on and reclaim some of his lost childhood at school.

Excellent point.

I suspect that Sirius and James and even Lily probably thought all the cloak and dagger stuff against Voldemort was something of a game and a bit of a lark

It plays that way for me, too. Lupin and Snape, however, probably both took the situation seriously from the start. I wonder if this contributed to their later ability to behave with civility and a certain grudging respect for each other in PoA.

[maidenjedi]

First: yes, have heard that CD, and totally agree with you. :-)

Second: I wonder about Lupin's missing years, I really do. We know what everyone else was up to. Sirius was imprisoned (and HELL YES to his being so immature as a direct consequence - Dementor sickness and the like do not a grown-up make). Snape was under Dumbledore's protection and guidance, and probably taught for a large portion of those years (my guess is five or so, prior to Harry's coming to Hogwarts). Pettigrew was a rat, literally and figuratively. We don't know where Remus went or what he did. But I will contend that he's the most mature by circumstance if not in fact. I wonder, though, at his reunion with Sirius, and how one would affect the other. Would Remus even be able to stomach post-Azkaban Sirius for long periods of time? Could a friendship rekindle after all they went through separately?

I'd like to see fanfiction that dealt with these issues, instead of assuming Remus' forgiving nature and Sirius' suddenly grown-up attitude. A very few have, I know, but the community is lacking in it.

Hmm.

Okay, I'm starving for book five. I keep getting all thoughtful about this!

[pauraque]

First: yes, have heard that CD, and totally agree with you. :-)

Ah, another Tool fan! I knew that compatibility test was full of crap. ;)

I wonder about Lupin's missing years, I really do.

So do I. I'm dying to know if we'll find out more about that in OotP.

I wonder, though, at his reunion with Sirius, and how one would affect the other. Would Remus even be able to stomach post-Azkaban Sirius for long periods of time? Could a friendship rekindle after all they went through separately?

Very good questions. In all that time, Remus must have come to terms with the belief that Sirius was a traitor and Peter a hero, and after the adrenaline rush of that first reunion, it's got to take some time for Remus to sort out his feelings and put them all back in order.

I'd like to see fanfiction that dealt with these issues, instead of assuming Remus' forgiving nature

Yeah, I don't get that. Remus certainly isn't very forgiving of Peter in the Shrieking Shack. People do have a tendency to write Remus as a saint or a shrinking violet, which always bugs me.