Newfic.

[pauraque_bk]

Boy, it's not that easy to do chapter commentaries and keep up with a couple of TV shows and write fic all at once. (This is one of the reasons I like summer -- no TV fandom distractions.) Plus there are also things to do aside from fandom, or so I have heard.

Today I shirked some other things and devoted the afternoon to finishing this:

Split (NC-17, Tom/Slughorn + Tom/Dumbledore)

Ever since _hannelore wrote Double Penetration (NC-17, Slughorn/Tom/Dumbledore) back in July, I've wanted to do something along similar lines, and the current pornish_pixies challenge provided the perfect opportunity. rubynye memorably called Double Penetration "a pineapple-flavored vortex of smut", a review which I will not attempt to equal. If Slughorn porn (Slugporn?) isn't a deal-breaker for you, I highly recommend it. (And the extra smut in the comments. *drool*) I can only hope my companion piece is a decent tribute!

*

By the way, did you know that snakes, in addition to having forked tongues, have forked penises?

Well, they do.

Comments

[happiestwhen.livejournal.com]

By the way, did you know that snakes, in addition to having forked tongues, have forked penises?

I have a bad feeling that I'm going to have a nightmare about this sometime in the future.

This gives a whole new angle to Parselsmut. >_>

[pauraque]

I always wondered how many penises ressurected!snake!Voldemort had.

What do you think are the odds we could get JKR to answer that one?

[ook.livejournal.com]

Google image for "hemipenis."

In theatresm's HP fic "Chaos Has Come Again," there was a persistent rumor that circulated among the Gryffindor students that the Slytherin males had forked/split penises. Just an amusing throwaway detail.

[pauraque]

I've seen hemipenes before; I've been interested in snakes for years. (Mine's a girl, though, so of course her penis count is a bit lower.)

And I've known theatresm for years, but I still haven't read that fic of hers!

[amythis.livejournal.com]

Considering her lack of snake-knowledge, perhaps it's just as well if she doesn't.

A quick Net search reveals, "Iguanas, koalas and Komodo dragons all appear to have two penises." Also earworms and flatworms. Mm, earworm-porn.

[sedesdraconis.livejournal.com]

Indeed. All marsupials have bifurcated penis (and vaginas). Textbooks are pretty good about diagramming the bifurcated vagina and correspnoding paired wombs, but I've never managed to get a picture of what the bifurcated penis looks like.

Don't look at me like that! I need to know, I have a sentient species of marsupial in my ConWorld!

[pauraque]

I doubt that most of the people who read my journal would look at you "like that" for any interests you might have. :D

Isn't there also a marsupial with a quadripartite (I think that's a word) penis? I feel like I read that recently.

*Slugporn love*

[mctabby.livejournal.com]

Link added to the Tom-Voldemort/Albus masterlist. :)

Re: *Slugporn love*

[pauraque]

Oh, awesome. Thanks. :)

[http://users.livejournal.com/_hannelore/]

My goodness, that's right up there with cats and their barbed penises. :D

*blushes lots* Now to write a more coherent review of teh slugporn...

(*thinks about addding "pineapple-flavored vortex of smut" to interests*)

[pauraque]

I think I'd be more likely to have sex with a being who had multiple penises than just one barbed one.

That's just me.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_hannelore/]

Three! Consecutive! Penises! :D

[pauraque]

I see you! Lurking! Lying in wait!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_hannelore/]

*pouncepouncepounce!*

I'll be right there with my lawnmower. Promise. :P